Reason, Doubt and Reasonable Doubt
February 15, 2010

Ugh. Jury duty. Dread.

I reported to the federal courthouse building on a snowy morning when I’d rather have stayed in bed. My hope was that I’d be quickly excused, but as the process unfolded, I became intrigued. My name was called, the judge questioned me and the next thing I knew I was a juror.

The defendant, a convicted felon, was charged with possession of ammunition, specifically 13 bullets, which is a violation of federal law. The defendant had signed a form on which he had admitted he possessed the bullets. It was our job to decide whether or not he possessed the ammunition, which police had found in his room. Nothing more, nothing less. Simple, right?


Not so fast. The defense tried to shed doubt on things I’d have taken for granted. What proof do we have that the defendant actually lived at this address? Was he coerced into signing police documents? With a tenth-grade education, was he able to read the documents he signed?

Uh oh. Time to actually engage the gray matter in what was to become a stimluating intellectual exercise.

Takeaways

  • The process worked. At the end of the prosecution’s opening statement, I’d have convicted the guy on the spot. But the defense attorney made me think through all the possibilities and not be so quick to jump to the obvious conclusion. The doubt he planted forced me to work through the facts systematically rather than accepting what I’d been told. Though we did return a guilty verdict, we did so on the basis of reason and not prejudice, assumptions or others’ version of the facts.
  • This is difficult to admit, but … it’s the first time I’ve ever looked at an accused criminal and seen a real person. As I looked at this man, I didn’t feel contempt. Or fear. Or anger. Instead, I wondered what his childhood might have been like? What pain and struggles could have led him here? I felt a compassion that surprised me and actually prayed for him as I waited to be questioned.
  • Diversity is cool. The 12 people chosen for this jury could not have been more different. Young and old, black and white, homemaker, clerical worker, entrepreneur, chef, doctor, airplane mechanic, nurse to name a few. Our life experiences brought us to the same place by many different paths, yet our charge was to arrive at a unanimous verdict. The deliberation was lively, often loud, but always respectful. No one got angry and there was a genuine effort to see and appreciate all points of view.
  • At least for me, it’s very difficult to separate emotions and personal experience from objective facts. The judge explained that we could consider only evidence, which he defined as witness testimony, exhibits, stipulations and judicial notice (I can’t really explain judicial notice, so go here if you’re curious). Time and time again, I had to consciously force my mind to separate facts from my feelings about the case, as did others. It was a constant struggle for all of us to stay focused on the evidence.

How does this apply to my life?

  • Doubt I found doubt to be the catalyst that forced me not to rely on assumptions. It’s easy to accept statements from sources we trust, instead of using our intellect and reason to fully evaluate their arguments. That is lazy. When there are important decisions at stake, I’ll force myself to ask more questions and consider facts, not emotions.
  • Empathy Though I’ve always been pretty good at seeing both sides of an argument, I was reminded of how far empathy goes to defuse tension. Acknowledging someone’s point of view whether or not we agree can take down the temperature of an argument quickly. I’ll make a more conscious effort to understand others’ point of view and let them know that.
  • Compassion The defendant’s chair. There but for the grace of God am I. And you. God allowed me to be born into in a loving family through no effort or merit of my own. I have taken for granted food, clothing, a comfortable home, education and many material resources others must do without. Who knows where I would be if my childhood had been full of abuse, neglect, pain, hunger and poverty? I’ll try harder not to judge people. Even felons.
  • Assumptions We all make snap judgments. It’s easy. And wrong. People with tattoos and piercings are scary. Long-haired males probably smoke pot. Poor people are lazy. Those of other races can’t be trusted. Anyone who doesn’t believe as I do is immoral. Or stupid. I’ll take the time to get to know people rather than relying on outward appearance.

I believe we should embrace doubt; challenge and question what we believe from time to time. Let it drive us to distill the truth out of the assumptions and prejudices that are an unavoidable part of the human condition.

Do you ever doubt what you believe? Does the process of thinking through that doubt help you to clarify beliefs and decisions?

4 Comments

  1. beth g sanders

    Thanks, Dave. Not such easy thoughts to put into words for some reason.

    And, yes, the geek is alive and well, as always. 🙂

    Reply
  2. lalunablanca

    Fantastic post, Beth. I most enjoyed the statement, “…consciously force my mind to separate facts from my feelings…”, very rich with thought. (and I see the geek alive and well with the “Buzz it!” link 🙂

    Reply
  3. beth g sanders

    Thanks, Dave. Not such easy thoughts to put into words for some reason.

    And, yes, the geek is alive and well, as always. 🙂

    Reply
  4. lalunablanca

    Fantastic post, Beth. I most enjoyed the statement, “…consciously force my mind to separate facts from my feelings…”, very rich with thought. (and I see the geek alive and well with the “Buzz it!” link 🙂

    Reply

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